There is no sense in trying to 'fix' everything at once. Things need to be broken down into smaller and smaller problems. Then you will be able to draw up a plan to tackle each of them one at a time. But let's not fool anyone, this is not going to be easy.

So where do you start? Well, find some time for yourself and write down what you want, perhaps start by imagining an ideal life. Write down what it is like, what it feels like, what is happening, where are you. Write it all down and then read it back to yourself. This is like a 'goal' for you. It may seem like an impossible dream but it does give you something to aim for. You may feel you could never achieve your impossible dream but isn't getting somewhere toward it better than where you are now?

Then look at your goal and try to tell yourself what is the most important thing about it? Is it your kids' welfare? happiness? security? earning money?  When you do this, you are likely to spot several things that seem important. That is great, you are starting to break your goal down into different areas, areas that you can work on one at a time in little steps. The important thing at this time is .... write it down.

The next step is to take one or two of these important things and then to say to yourself , 'what is the first thing I can do to help achieve this?'  Write it down.

You have now written down one or two steps for you to take to help achieve your goal.

The worst part comes next. Take what you have written down and share it with other people. Yes that can be scary but it has to be done. Why? because you are looking for support. It does not matter how little or how often someone can support you, every little bit of support will help. But nobody can help support you if they do not know what you want.

So share it with your mother, share it with your best friend, share it with your neighbor, if it helps .. share it in a letter to the local newspaper. Share it with anybody who's ready to listen.

Share it with your ex..... Oh yes. After all it is his kids that are involved  and if he knows that you want the best for them, then he might just support you in some small way.

This may all sound a bit scary and a bit impractical at this time. All that can be said is 'just do it' This is just a first step to get you moving forward in your life.