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At times in our lives, we each experience
problems in our relationships, in dating or meeting people.
Sometimes these relationship problems can be small ones and
sometimes they can be major ones. We can all use a little help
and advice in dealing with these problems. One of the best ways
of seeking help is to talk about or share your problems. Here,
we give you the chance to tell us about your problem. |
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Should I Confront My Husband?
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Hi I'm 24 and recently got
married in August. I was with my husband for 6 years prior to
getting married and we have a little girl who was born in February
this year.
I suspect that he may have
cheated on me before we got married, possibly numerous times.
Any time I did see an "unusual" message on his mobile phone (which
was and is still very rare as he is so protective of it) and
confronted him about it he always came up with an excuse.
I love him so much and was always
afraid of losing him so I always accepted the stories. I don't
think he has cheated on me since we got married (though I cant be
sure) but thinking that he was with other women makes me feel sick
and I just cant stop thinking about it.
I want to confront him but dont
know how. Im also afraid if I confront him that he will either
walk out or he will tell me the truth and I wont be able to stay
with him any longer. As I said we had a little girl in
February and I havent returned to work. If I leave him I would
be left homeless and without a penny.
Please help what should I do?
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Our reply
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There is clearly a lot of worry on your mind and it seems that you
are concerned about your security within this marriage.
You
say that you love this man and that you want to be with him. You say
that you do not feel he has cheated on you since the marriage. There
are many other women who wish they could say the same!
Do you have any real grounds to suspect him of cheating on you since
the wedding? If not, then confronting him will only make matters
much worse. It seems from your email that you realise this.
A relationship is built upon trust. At the moment, it appears that
you still have some doubts about your trust for your husband and
that you are seeking to gain that trust. Confronting him at this
point will do nothing to build trust, that trust has to come from
within you and can only do so with time.
In the meantime, to help you understand how to build that trust,
we'd recommend this ebook, which is available for download on the
web.
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